I Have No Luck

This was the position I've always felt I wanted to take. Being in this position would really help me. It would've been an important opportunity for me. Why is that happening? Why didn't I get what I wanted? A small mistake can change everything. I didn't have the chance to prove myself. Maybe, I had the chance, and I did, but they still can't make exceptions. I appreciate their help. I appreciate the fact that they listened to me, even if they didn't accept, but at least they gave me my chance, they listened, and finally.. They took the decision. 

Why am I fighting that hard to get what I want, when I know that they won't accept. Maybe because I know that I would be responsible and that I would provide good work. 

One day, I saw that I wasn't included in the post they made on Facebook. I was surprised, I was astonished, I didn't believe what my eyes saw. I talked to the person who didn't accept me. He gave me reasons that I couldn't admit they were right. I thought that it might be a mistake made by them, but I realized that it's no mistake. I was totally against the reasons the person had given me. I was like "NO, you should accept me, just stop saying that". I thought it was because the director didn't like me and that she has things towards me, since she was my teacher last year, and I wasn't a good student, AT ALL. I was serious about the fact that I wanted to fight for my right. The person was trying to convince me that there is no possibilities or chances, but still, I fought for what I wanted. I still wanted to talk to the responsible (the director). Another day has come, it was this short day at school. Interviews for the people who are accepted were running. Actually the director wanted to see me. I was excited. I thought they could talk to me, I could convince them and then they would schedule me a specific time for the actual interview. I had to go to see them in the break time. I went. I waited, and waited, and again waited, hoping they would tell me, "We accept you, and you are an exception," since it wasn't my fault. It was the coordinator's fault. The minute I should enter the room has come. I entered, full of confidence, happiness, assurance. I saw smiles upon their faces. They started asking me one question. "Ziyad, can you please tell us your problem? Since the decision is not only the director's but all of us."  

I started explaining, wishing they would take my situation into consideration AND then surprise me by saying: "you are accepted". But unfortunately, the decision wasn't what I expected. It was worse. They didn't accept me. 

The good thing, and the thing that satisfied me, is that they were pleased with my guiding package. (The topic I chose). And at this moment, I felt that that the director likes me, normally. I left the room, unhappy, sad, not satisfied, ill-chosen and doomed. 

In fact, I know they it's their loss. I respected their decision. I know I'm really good, I'm extremely good. I know I'm perfect. I know I could have a higher position the year I'm going to be a senior. I know I can take the highest position in next year's interview. I know that I proved myself. 

Finally, I'm glad that they were happy with my work. 

Now, I'm willing to do the best I can to get the position I want in two years. 

Thank you.